Here’s a simple concept that can dramatically change how you communicate with your partner, and improve your relationship: validation
Validation means the person speaking feels understood by the one listening, regardless of each person’s own perspective. It doesn’t mean you agree with what they’re saying, only that you hear them and you care. This comes from a place of respect and maturity of understanding that your relationship is more important than you being right. Think of validation as helping the other person feel that their thoughts are valid and okay.
It might sound very basic but you can imagine how hard it might be to put aside your ego during an argument and make sure your partner feels heard. Start practicing during a neutral conversation and see how it goes.
Here are some ways to start:
Rachel
Validation means the person speaking feels understood by the one listening, regardless of each person’s own perspective. It doesn’t mean you agree with what they’re saying, only that you hear them and you care. This comes from a place of respect and maturity of understanding that your relationship is more important than you being right. Think of validation as helping the other person feel that their thoughts are valid and okay.
It might sound very basic but you can imagine how hard it might be to put aside your ego during an argument and make sure your partner feels heard. Start practicing during a neutral conversation and see how it goes.
Here are some ways to start:
- I understand how you feel…
- I see where you’re coming from…
- I think you’re saying…
- … is that right?
Rachel