How can I be the best parent to my kids?
There is, obviously, no one right answer to that question, but it’s definitely a concern shared by most parents. They want to make sure to raise the best children they can who love and admire them as parents. Parents want to make sure their kids get all of the opportunities they never did, and that they turn out to be outstanding people. I think those are all great aspirations for parents and parents-to-be. However, there is one wish a lot of parents have for their kids that I think stirs them in the direction of making a huge parenting mistake: Wishing for their children to never have to experience anything unpleasant.
This is clearly a wish that comes with the best of intentions from parents, but it also comes with a downside: life will inevitably hand you some unpleasantness to deal with. If your children never encounter any worry, fear, sadness, or heartbreak, imagine what a culture shock it will be for them as they enter the real world. Sooner or later, they will have to deal with an anxiety-proving situation of a big exam, a break-up, or a significant loss. When children are sheltered from anything and everything unpleasant, they don’t develop the coping skills they need to work through life’s painful moments. As great as it would be to ensure that your children would never have to feel anything “bad”, it’s much greater to support them through difficult situations and model healthy coping skills for them to use. In my opinion, this makes for a person.
(Please pardon my lack of blogging, my site has been doing a little migrating… but I’m back!)
There is, obviously, no one right answer to that question, but it’s definitely a concern shared by most parents. They want to make sure to raise the best children they can who love and admire them as parents. Parents want to make sure their kids get all of the opportunities they never did, and that they turn out to be outstanding people. I think those are all great aspirations for parents and parents-to-be. However, there is one wish a lot of parents have for their kids that I think stirs them in the direction of making a huge parenting mistake: Wishing for their children to never have to experience anything unpleasant.
This is clearly a wish that comes with the best of intentions from parents, but it also comes with a downside: life will inevitably hand you some unpleasantness to deal with. If your children never encounter any worry, fear, sadness, or heartbreak, imagine what a culture shock it will be for them as they enter the real world. Sooner or later, they will have to deal with an anxiety-proving situation of a big exam, a break-up, or a significant loss. When children are sheltered from anything and everything unpleasant, they don’t develop the coping skills they need to work through life’s painful moments. As great as it would be to ensure that your children would never have to feel anything “bad”, it’s much greater to support them through difficult situations and model healthy coping skills for them to use. In my opinion, this makes for a person.
(Please pardon my lack of blogging, my site has been doing a little migrating… but I’m back!)